Poop Shute

Then Noel wrote...

So Princess Noel was bored out of her mind, besides being pissed off
that she was kidnapped, so she decided to put on a show to entertain
herself. When the Wicked Witch of Ohio learned of what Princess Noel
was doing, she decided to show off Noel's extensive talent to her
friends and relatives. She planned a big party and informed Princess
Noel of her plan. Having this information, the Princess began to work
out a plan of escape. The Wicked Witch of Ohio noticed that Princess
Noel had increased her work extensively and was pleased, thinking that
Noel had begun to actually feel affectionate towards the bitter old
woman, but, sadly for her, it was only the Princess weaving her web of
deception. (mua ha ha haaaa) So the Witch sent out her invitations to
all of her friends:
Friends and Relatives!

You are cordially invited
To the Coply Ohio Castle
On Saturday, May 25th
For the unveiling of a
New and exciting performer.
This performance will be the beginning of
An ongoing festival running through May 31st.

Please RSVP by way of Flying Monkey
Questions? Call the
OINGEAGWEDDINGPLANNERSJIONGES
Vallet parking will be provided
($10 fee for Dragon Parking - Visa and Mastercard accepted.)

Sincerely,

- The Wicked witch of ohio -


Well, this, of course, stirred up quite a lot of excitement being that
no one was ever invited to visit the Wicked Witch of Ohio, nor did they
want to, but this seemed like a good enough reason. They sent out their
flying monkeys and the Wicked Witch of Ohio was pleased to see the
invitations flooding in each day. She even became so confident in the
success of her party and festival that she invited several members of
the press to come and write reviews. While this was going on, Princess
Noel was incessantly working on her escape plan. After much anguish
over the plan, she was finally finished, and even one day early! So she
drank herself into oblivion and passed out.
The next day, the Witch came to get Princess Noel and found her passed
out on the floor, presumably from working so hard, and was pleased. She
decided just to let her sleep but leave a new dress for her to wear to
the opening. The Princess drowsily arose around 2 in the afternoon only
to find the most beautiful dress she had ever seen. The night arrived
and the Witch's henchmen were instructed to bring the Princess into the
main dining hall. They retrieved her and led her to the stage entrance.
The Wicked Witch of Ohio gave an opening speech, thanking everyone for
their attendance and welcoming them into her home, and without further
ado, announced the new performer and exited the stage to join the
audience as they ate their dinners, nervously wondering what everyone
would think but quite confident in her success.
The lights went up and there stood the fairest (ok, tied for fairest
with The Princess Meg) young lady they had ever seen. She stood frozen
under a blue light, posed in apprehension, and about to explode into
action. The audience drew in a breath and waited excitedly for the
first move, all twitching with anticipation. But the first mood did not
come for at least half a minute yet the audience could not seem to tear
their eyes away from the beautiful statuesque lady. All at once the
lights changed to red and rolling drums appeared out of nowhere,
beating out a rhythm, hard to follow, but followed the whole way, with
catlike fluidity and glass sharpness, by the figure on stage. The next
piece was this dancer suddenly transformed into a singer standing
center stage in a spotlight sending elegant opera music out over the
audience and enchanting them into her spell. They adored here. The rest
of the night played out in this fashion. Princess Noel switching her
type of performing art every single song for an hour and a half
straight and the audience's eyes fixed on her through it all.
After the last of the audience had grudgingly and sulkily filtered
out, the Wicked Witch of Ohio congratulated herself by throwing some
chickens off of the second highest tower (Princess Noel being locked in
the first highest tower upon her insistence) and watching them attempt
to fly down and land peacefully as they plummeted to the ground,
flapping and squawking the whole way. She then went to the kitchen and
fixed herself a newt sandwich and feeling particularly pleasant for
once, decided to go visit Princess Noel and congratulate her by
awarding her with some freedom. The Witch climbed to the tallest tower
and swung the heavy wooden door open, only to find Noel sitting on the
floor working quickly on something in the corner. The Princess stuffed
the project under the bed and turned to greet the witch with a small
wand-case that she'd sewn, pretending that the case had been what she
was working on. The Witch was flattered and almost felt bad about
taking the Princess Noel hostage, but not quite. As she stood in front
of the door, crunching her newt sandwich while legs and toes fell out
of the space between the bread, she informed Princess Noel of her newly
earned privileges. The Princess was delighted to know how well she'd
done, but even happier to find out that she was now allowed to wander
the castle and the grounds of it when escorted by four guards (because
two was definitely not enough due to her extensive weaponry training).
This new freedom meant that Princess Noel could scout for escape routs
and find the location of food and weaponry around the castle. She
thanked the Wicked Witch of Ohio and after the Witch left for bed began
working on part two of her plan.
The next day she took full advantage of her new allowance to wander
around by rising early and covering the entirety of the castle grounds,
telling the guards that she was compensating for the lack of exercise
she got while up in that stuffy cramped little tower. They gladly
obliged as they, too, had grown fond of the Princess and followed her
wherever she pleased. The night came on and Princess Noel was taken
back to the tower to prepare for her second performance. The Witch sent
the guards to bring her to the stage. Upon arriving to take her away,
they opened the door and found her wearing the queerest outfit. They
supposed that it must be in fashion and that the Witch had given it to
her to wear, since they had seen the Witch walking with some sort of
clothing folded in her arms earlier that day. So, shrugging their
shoulders, they escorted her down to the stage entrance.
As the lights went up and the audience gasped and shrieked! Standing
there before them was a woman? A man? Dear god! What is that thing?!?
The most horrific looking creature stood on the stage and blinked out
at them. A few people ran for the door, others just sat stiffly in
their chairs waiting for what would happen next. The Witch froze where
she sat...

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN!
To be continued...