Poop Shute

I'm digging Child's Play folks

You ever wonder what life was like on the set of FULL HOUSE once the cameras stopped rolling? I'm guessing things were pretty foul. It's seems that when a person has to filter themself and put forward this G-rated face all the time that behind the scenes they let the raunch flow freely. Actually, scratch that. I'm not guessing. I know. First hand. Not only from watching Bob Saget's stand-up (shudder) but from working at Child's Play.

I have said before that I wasn't looking forward to this project, but these people are tons of fun, even if the subject matter isn't. We make lewd gestures, sound effects, bad jokes, practical jokes, etc. And a lot of that stuff happens ON stage. The best part is that the audience has no clue.

Tonight, for example, Dwayne (our Ben Weatherstaff) decided to play a little with Laurie (the Robin puppeteer / Mrs. Craven's spirit). There's a moment where he and I move two set pieces onto the stage and are standing behind them while she is manipulating the Robin puppet right in between us. Keep in mind that she is clearly visible to the audience, just peeking out from behind the set, while Ben and I are hidden on either side of her, just a foot or two away. Dwayne begins to quietly make very sexual grunting noises mere inches from her ear. Ooohhh. Ooohhh. Ooohhh. OoooOOohhh. Just loud enough for Laurie and I to hear, but not loud enough to be heard by anyone else because of the underscoring. I'm standing behind my pillar, clutching it to keep myself from collapsing with laughter, while Laurie (to her credit) was barely showing the slightest hint of a grin. That girl is a trooper. She has my undying respect.

Oh, and by the way, Dwayne is VERY gay, so sexual ear-grunting on Laurie is not as creepy as it may sound. Plus he was trying not to laugh his ass off himself as he was doing it.

Speaking of Dwayne being very gay, here's a little interchange from a couple days ago. I often get the sense that Dwayne is flirting with me, so I flirt back. It's all in good fun, and I think we both understand that. This conversation took place after James (playing Colin) found out that Dwayne had never seen THE THREE AMIGOS.

James: I want to watch that movie with you, man. I think you'd like it.

Dwayne: Well, are you going to put out?

James: (laughs) No.

Dwayne: Well, then. Forget it.

I saw an opportunity, and jumped in.

ME: You know, I want to watch it with you too. I won't put out either... but I'll spoon.

Dwayne: Hmm... okay.

ME: Now, do you want to be the big spoon or the little spoon?

COMMENTS:

I have to give credit where it's due. The last joke was borrowed from Scrubs.
Ah, John C Mcginley. My hero.
Joey 04.02.06 - 3:19 am

It's a good thing you gave it credit. Without that context, there only appears to be one gay person in that exchange, and it sure ain't Dwayne
Josh 04.05.06 - 4:02 am