Poop Shute

When it rains it pours

So far this week I found out that a number of my friends have been keeping me in the dark about something that it turns out wasn't such a big deal anyway. I'm not upset about the actual thing they were hiding so much as the deception itself.

To be treated like a child that cannot be trusted to handle himself emotionally by the people I love and trust the most is quite a large slap in the face and it is not appreciated.

Then I talked with one old friend who was very upset because her grandmother may not live out the week. I want so much to help her in some way, but what can you do? Nothing. Nothing at all.

The very next day every piece of electronic equipment I came near went haywire. I was in a hurry to get my sound work to the theatre and that's when my CD burner wouldn't work, then Brian's CD burner wouldn't work, my MD burner wouldn't work, then the equipment at the theatre wouldn't work, etc etc. Not to mention I was late getting there anyway, which always looks bad. And then I topped that day off with a big, stupid fight with Meg.

Today I had a long and heated conversation with another old friend who opened my eyes to the fact that our friendship isn't at all what it used to be. Not by any stretch of the imagination. This point was made crystal clear by the fact that observations we made about each other's characters during this discussion haven't been applicable in quite some time. I had to cry when I realized this shift had occured years ago without me even noticing.

And today I found out that somebody very special to me may not live to see Christmas.

I have never felt so helpless in my life. I mean, this isn't a "poor me" party, a great deal of this clearly isn't about me.

It's just one of those times where Life reminds you that you are not the one in the driver's seat, whether you like it or not.

Buckle up, it's a bumpy ride, and Life cut the shocks because it likes the low-rider look.