Poop Shute

Lions and Tigers and Drag Queens, Oh My!

Oh, the LA club scene.
Where the men are gay and the women are men.

Seriously, I checked out more dudes before I knew they were dudes than I did women. I only saw about a dozen actual women all night.

Maybe I should be more specific and say the LA gay club scene.

I had a blast last night. I went with Julie and a couple of her friends to this gay bar called "Here." It is such an ego boost to be hit on all night, even if it is by dudes. I had my ass anonymously groped five times by night's end. One of them was what I like to call a "jogging goose."
Jogging because he had two fingers run up the back of my leg into my ass.

As it was Halloween I went in costume. I took a plastic novelty knife and jammed it through a box of Cheerios and ran some fake blood down the front. Get it?

Cereal killer.

I got roars of laughter all night. Everywhere we went I heard "Ha ha! Cereal killer! That's great!"

Except one guy and his friend. We'll call them Bob and Dave, since I didn't know their names.

Bob: Hey man, yeah, I hate Cheerios too.

Dave: Dude, he's a cereal killer.

Bob:.........ooooooooOOOOOOOOH. I get it now.

Dave: Are you f**king retarded?

I kid you not. Bob was serious. Whether or not someone could hate a breakfast food THAT much isn't nearly as important as how crappy a costume "Cheerios Hater" really is.

Other clever costumes of the night:

Dude dressed as Martha Stewart with sign reading "I'm innocent" and fliers reading "free Martha."

Three guys dressed as Heinz ketchup, mustard, and relish. All the bottles bearing stickers supporting John Kerry.

Two guys dressed in perfect reproductions of 14th century french women's dresses and over-sized powdered wigs. The clever part is ALL of it, including the wigs was made from bubble wrap. Different sized bubbles and in different configurations. It was amazing.