Poop Shute

Torn

I am having fun. The show is a rollercoaster ride that I get paid to go on. It's a blast. I've also made some very good new friends.

BUT

My wife is going through a very rough time without me, and I want to be there for her. And besides the rough time, I just plain can't stand being away from her. I think I've figured out that my stomach issues are related to that. I also miss my mom and my dad and my brother, and my Ryan. Mostly Meg, but those are all a close second. As nice as some of the things here are, they do not make up for the gaping hole inside me right now. I am faced with a tough decision. Should I stay or should I go?

Also, I have a former friend who suddenly wants to mail me "stuff" while I'm out here. I have a sneaking suspicion I have some idea of what it may be, but I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt until it gets here. We'll see.

The local Comfort Inn is throwing us a pool party today. We're kind of local celebrities here. The sad thing is it's a totally overcast day and a little too chilly to swim. The free food and cheap beer are nice for some, but I don't eat much meat, and I'm not a big drinker anymore either. So I'm quietly sitting in the corner of the hotel bar, and blogging. The free internet is fun enough for me.

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I've already addressed the editing of expletives on my blog, but I'll reiterate. I have the Google ad ribbon in my side bar. Google has programs in place that scan all pages that use their ad bars for any words above a G-rating. If I cuss I get an email saying that if I do not remove the offending word(s) they will pull their ads from my page. So, I just misspell to avoid the attention of their scanning bots. As of yet the ads have not earned me anything, and I don't really expect them to, but I like having them.

COMMENTS:

Well, I miss you a lot buddy and I would love for you to come home...but I would want what's best for you to come first, and if that's your career then so be it.
Smooches,
Nick 06.25.06 - 9:12 pm

I know EXACTLY what you mean.
Natalie Imbruglia 06.26.06 - 1:16 am

Stay the course my friend. It's only been a month. Stay strong and fight the good fight.
therealdavid 06.26.06 - 7:19 am

How long were you originally scheduled to be there?
Edward Carter 06.26.06 - 9:25 pm

I'm here til the first week of Septmeber and that seems like eons away right now.
:-(
Joey 06.27.06 - 12:57 pm

This is a test. This is only a test. That's not really from Natalie Imbruglia, is it? I know. I'm gullible. Love you. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine!!!!
Mom 06.27.06 - 3:45 pm

I think you should stay and tough it out because many opportunities lead to other opportunities. You could blow something for yourself if you leave. Everyone will still love you when you get back to AZ. And it's important to be there for Meg in general, but I'm sure she understands and even respects you for taking this gig. Nothing worth doing is easy.
And as much as I respect Nick's sentiment and sensitivity, and Nick in general, you know very well that you can't start defining what you're doing as only a career and I don't care what's best for you, a$$hole. You have to stay. : )
And fvck the ads.
That's all.
Your friend,
Josh hagler 06.27.06 - 9:00 pm

I'd say that a healthy marriage is the backbone of all your endeavors. But leaving your current job may not be the best way of deepening your relationship with Meg. After all, leaving Arizona to pursue other opportunities is something that's going to happen again, and you might as well find out the best way to acclimate to time apart.
I think doing well and being happy is one of the best ways to help anyone close to you achieve the same.
I believe that with patience and dilligent caring, a solution to your dillema will present itself that will allow you to pursue your own lives and your life together at the same time.
I would also caution you againts framing this dillema as binary. I think you can find other options besides staying or going.
Miss you,
Beno 06.27.06 - 11:17 pm

Thanks for the thoughts guys, but advice is always wasted. Either it's wasted on those who don't need it, or wasted on those who are too stubborn to realize they do need it.
I wasn't fishing for it either. Just venting.
Oh, and Ben, any and all options will involve one or the other when it comes to staying here or going home. There may be other details to layer on, of course, but all options include one of the two choices. I suppose I could up and move to Paris, Texas. But it's not likely.
Joey 06.28.06 - 5:36 am

Where the fvuck is all the indian porn?! That's false advertising, man!
Disgruntled (Gurg) 06.30.06 - 3:43 am