Poop Shute

A Blade Down Memory Lane

Tonight I went out for my usual rollerblading around the neighborhood, and I found myself wanting to go farther than usual. I've been going up and down the same handful of streets for weeks now, and I felt a need for some new scenery, so when I noticed a street I had never noticed before that lead further south into the neighborhood I took it.

It lead me to Cathedral Rock Drive. Why did that sound so familiar...

Then after two more turns I was on White Aster. I swear I've never been in this section, but...

Then I hit Big Horn and a flood of memories washed over me.

I had, in fact been there before, and more than a few times. From Big Horn I backtracked to White Aster and there it was.

Heidi's house.

Those of you that knew me in middle school and early high school will remember the name Heidi and roll your eyes, I'm sure. Heidi was my first big love... well, first love after puberty anyway, and I whined about her. A lot. For a couple years.

Heidi and I met at a "Christmas party" for the children of my parents' coworkers. The parents were having their big office party, so the receptionist's oldest daughter, Brenda, babysat all the office brats at her house. You'll note that the name of the party is in quotes, and that is simply because of me being the wise, old age of 13 I wouldn't have agreed to go to a "babysitter's" house, but a Christmas party was cool. My parents were good diplomats.

Anyway, Heidi was there and Brenda decided we would be cute together and sort of announced us a couple. That was that.

The problem is Heidi went to another school, so we had to do the phone thing... every night... for hours on end. After a while I got sick of it and just stopped calling, but then regretted it, called her up and begged her to take me back. Ah, the 13 year-old's version of relationship woes. It seems so cute now. In a very dumb way.

Now, fast-forward to the following school year. By a complete and total coincidence Heidi's family had moved and she transferred to Centennial (my school). I was hopeful that we could actually date now, but immediately she began dating a guy named Mark Carson, and spent most of the year with him. I remember that near the end of the year they broke up, and her and I started dating, but for the life of me I can't remember how that time ended, but I'm pretty sure it was my fault, I mean relationships ending were usually my fault until college. During this time I spent more than a few afternoons at her house hanging out. Her house on White Aster, just a few streets over from my Dad's house

Fast forward again to another year or so later. We began to talk again, and I called her and told her I still had feelings for her and all that. So she invited me over to her house and we watched that STUPID MOVIE where the little girl has the trained monkey who pickpockets people, and we made out a little. When I left she told me the ball was in my court. That was fair, I had bailed on her twice now, so she wanted me to take action for a while until she felt she could trust me.

The next day was Wednesday and I woke up horribly sick. I had a high grade fever and I was barely concious for the better part of the next four days. For some reason I remember that it was Easter, because the first thing I do remember after the fever broke was watching TEN COMMANDMENTS on TV. Also coincidentally the same day I was given my first guitar.

The following Monday I went back to school looking forward to seeing Heidi again. When I got to the lockers she was at hers talking to some guy. As I made my way over to them she leaned in, gave him a long, full kiss and said "bye" as he walked away.

I froze, dead in my tracks.

This was like some horribly all-too-real version of some scene from THE WONDER YEARS. I could almost hear DANIEL STERN's narraration as the very short moment played out in agonizing slow motion with some depressing music underscoring it all.

Fortunately, I was still a good distance away and she never even noticed that I saw as she walked off the other way. I don't know what I would have said, if anything.

As hard as that was for my little 15 year-old heart to handle, my 24 year-old brain points out that from her perspective her actions were completely justified. She put the ball in my court and that's right where it sat untouched for nearly a week. Sure, I could have gone to her and told her that I was sick and couldn't have called if I had wanted to (AND I DID) but the damage was done. She was with him.