Panic washes over the countryside of the Land Of Poop like a tsunami today as its residents discover that Official Gurg, along with the full military force of The Land Of Poop have yet to report in from the Norwegia front in nearly two full days!
Today Lord Knucklehead himself went to the Gurg's capitol and demanded answers. He was greeted by a very large shirtless man covered in scars.
Lord K: Excuse me, I am the Lord and Master of the neighboring lands, and I demand to speak with The Gurg.
Man: He's not here.
Lord K: Well, where is he? He is responsible for my men, and we have seen hide nor hair of any of them in nearly two days. Mind you these men are highly-trained and battle-tested killing machines! Not easy to replace!
Man: You mean the bear and the bat?
Lord K: Yes, of course I mean the... You're mocking me aren't you?
Man: Wouldn't dream of it.
Lord K: Look, I must warn you that open hostilities between our lands would be most harmful to all concerned.
Man: That a threat?
Lord K: No, it's not a-- AARGGHH! Look, I want answers: Where is The Gurg, and where are my men?
Man: Don't know.
Lord K: UGH! Fine. That's just fine, Mr Burly-Silent-type. Well, when you do know, please inform us immediately.
Man: Will do.
Lord K: .......well, thank you. .......have we met somewhere before? You look familiar.
Man: I doubt it.
Lord K: No, I'm sure of it. You're somebody famous or something, aren't you? What's that black cloth thingy hanging up behind you there?
Man: Uh... um, th-that's nothing. We'll keep you informed. Thanks, buh-bye.
And with that the gates of The Gurg's lands were abruptly shut to us. That's all the information we have for you as of now, folks. Just keep praying our boys make it home safe and sound.
Oh, and the Gurg too.
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