Poop Shute

Late Night Mexican Food Cujo Story

So John, David and myself were on our way back from Bookman's when John and I noticed that our stomachs were so empty they were devouring our internal organs, respectively. SO we decide it's time to stop for some late night burritos at Amado's. Mmmmm Amado's. The poor man's Philiberto's, and that is seriously saying something.

Anyway, as I pull into the parking lot I casually look out my driver's side window at the large SUV parked inches to my left and see the head of a massive dog peering out the open window right at me. Remember Marmaduke? This dog was fucking Marmaduke's bigger, meaner cousin.

I start to say "Woah, that's a big dog." My plan was to make this observation and calmly get out of the car anyway. All I got out was "Woah" in a slightly frightened tone, when the beast began barking in a very harrassed and frustrated way. Without missing a beat I calmly and silently put the car in reverse and slid two spots over. At this point I look over at John who has been pretty quiet for a few seconds, so naturally I figure something's wrong. I look over and he is shaking with laughter. So hard he makes hardly a sound. After we ordered, got our food, and got back in the car John finally stopped laughing. you haven't seen funny til you've seen John Roland, who's barely comprehensible at this point, trying to order a bean and guac burro from a guy who barely understands english. Once John can talk again he tells me that my reaction to the dog that got him rolling.

"What the hell would you have done?"

He says probably the same thing, but my calm and collected outward response to what was obviously terror was funny to him.