Once upon a time...

There was a small mouse and a great big elephant. They fell in love at first sight. The tiny mouse was so in love he asked the elephant to marry him. To his immense joy, she said yes!

They made great preparations for their wedding. Their families came together and there were flowers and everything anyone could ever want in a wedding.

Sadly, on that very same day the elephant died right there and then.

The mouse was, of course, very sad over his loss.

With the sadness also came a realization. He would spend all of the years of the rest of his life...

...digging.

**************************

It may have been the delivery of this story that made it so funny to me when I first heard it, or maybe it's just plain funny. You will have to tell me in the comments. Just in case you don't get it: it's her grave he'll be digging.

This joke was told during a Yin Yoga practice I was a part of. Yin differs from most other Yoga styles in that every pose is held for five solid minutes. With all that time to fill between new poses my teacher began telling us old Buddhist folktales, fables, koans and even jokes. With his very soft, soothing delivery it was hard to tell what was going to be deep and philosophical and what would simply have a punch line.

This, to me, had both.

Yes, it's funny to me that the poor mouse chose a mate whose passing requires of him the human equivalent of digging The Grand Canyon single-handedly.

But, also isn't this a great metaphor for any love affair? As much as we humans love to bandy about words like "forever" and "always" and the like, everything in this life comes to an end. Someone will inevitably leave the relationship, one way or another. Either through a breakup, or with the finality of death, every relationship comes to an end.

Our little mouse friend knew that too. On some level, we all know that eventually we will lose everyone we love. But our mouse lived in the moment without fear or worry. He grabbed hold of love for as long as he could. To me, there's something very admirable about that. In the end, his time with her was cut short, but he couldn't know that would happen at the outset.

And when you are the one left behind, whether by death or breakup, and you are faced with the need to "get over it" doesn't it seem like you are that mouse faced with an overwhelmingly monumental task? Doesn't putting the pieces back together sometimes feel as difficult as digging that Grand Canyon all by yourself?

I'm not currently nursing a broken heart, but I've had more than my fair share. Currently I am deeply and completely fulfilled with the life I have built for myself, but I still couldn't help but let that elephant joke ring through my head since I heard it.

This may sound strange, but I think there's something comforting about it. I think it's because so many of us can identify with that little mouse. His plight speaks to us, reminds us to embrace what we have while we have it, because it will all go away some day, and there is nothing to be done about it.

It is what it is.

On Nation, Under Spaghetti Monster...




No matter what you may or may not believe personally, you cannot tell me this is a Christian nation. I'm getting tired of people telling me this is one, like Mr Bush Senior, whom I quoted the other day. This is NOT a Christian nation, nor has it ever been, nor did the "Founding Fathers" ever intend it to be. I will support this with historical fact, and the words of those men themselves.

The pledge of allegiance is often cited as evidence by those who know nothing of it's history. The fact is it wasn't written until 1892, and in actuality it originally went like this:

"I pledge allegiance to my Flag and the Republic for which it stands, one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. America"

Note that absence of any God mention. In 1923 they changed "my Flag" to "the Flag of The United States of America." It wasn't until 1954, after much political maneuvering and struggling, that the phrase "under God" was added. Considering they were all long since dead and buried, the founding fathers could not have had anything to do with it, and in it's short fifty years of life, the new pledge has been a great source of uproar. It is still a source of controversy today. Lawsuits have been filed over this issue as recently as 2002, 2004, and again in 2006.

"In God We Trust" didn't appear on coins until the Civil War, in 1864. After that it still didn't appear on paper money until 1957, when anti-communist propaganda had the whole nation convinced that atheism and communism were one and the same thing. If you didn't want to be black-listed, you made damn sure that you supported God, especially if you were a senator faced with a vote on a new motto for printed money.

Beyond that, here are some interesting quotes from the pens of those great men, those Founding Fathers. Historians in general believe that most of them were Deists, which means they believed that God brought about existence, and then sat back to watch, but had no active participation or intervention of any kind. Some of these quotes seem to go further into agnosticism and even outright atheism. If these don't convince you that they had no intention of founding a Christian country, then I don't know what will.

"As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion; as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquillity, of Musselmen; and as the said States never have entered into any war or act of hostility against any Mehomitan nation, it is declared by the parties that no pretext arising from religious opinions shall ever produce an interruption of the harmony existing between the two countries."

-- The Treaty of Tripoli, drafted by George Washington in 1796, and signed by John Adams in 1797


"To talk of immaterial existences is to talk of nothings. To say that the human soul, angels, God are immaterial is to say they are nothings, or that there is no God, no angels, no soul. I cannot reason otherwise without plunging into the fathomless abyss of dreams and phantasms. I am satisfied and sufficiently occupied with the things which are without tormenting or troubling myself with those which may indeed be, but of which I have no evidence."

-- Thomas Jefferson


"Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call on her tribunal for every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness even the existence of a God, because if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear."

--Thomas Jefferson, in a letter to his nephew Peter Carr, 1787


"Christianity is the most perverted system that ever shone on man."

-- Thomas Jefferson


"During almost fifteen centuries has the legal establishment of Christianity been on trial. What has been it's fruits? More or less, in all places; pride and indolence in the clergy, ignorance and servility in the laity, and in both; superstition, bigotry and persecution."

-- James Madison


"Lighthouses are more useful than churches."

-- Benjamin Franklin


"This would be the best of all possible worlds if there were no religion in it."

-- John Adams

The Birthday Boys

We got Henry as a tiny malnourished kitten, about five-ish weeks old at the end of May 2004. As a result, I've always celebrated his birthday on my own, just to make things easier.

I took a long weekend for myself this week as my birthday present to myself. I was looking at my schedule, and I haven't had a full two days off in a row in nearly four months. Some weeks I haven't even had one full day off. My schedule has been roughly 60 to 70 hours per week. Don't get me wrong, I'm loving every second of it, but I thought I should take a few days right now while I can. Once Reefer gets in full swing, I won't see a day off again until late in the first week of July.

I am on day two of my four day weekend right now. Today I tanned for a bit, and worked out with my brother. Now I am about to jump in the shower to prepare for my exciting surprise evening with my lovely lady.

Cheers.

Happy Birthday to me (and Henry)
**sung to the tune of the traditional Happy Birthday song**

Happy Birthday to me (and Henry)
Happy Birthday to me (and Henry)
We look like a pair of monkeys,
and we smell like them too (especially Henry)